stress

i still feel the stress of being alive, despite the end of my exams officially...

i gotta get my groove back for piano and music, i gotta go get a job, i gotta go earn money, i gotta go see a doctor to make me pretty and perfect looking, i gotta go to the dentist, i gotta clean my room, i gotta prepare to start my term in January for a Tourism module, i gotta earn money, i gotta prove to my parents, i gotta prepare for my future (or yours?), i gotta save money to get married, i gotta plan my career, i gotta improve my qualifications, i gotta save money for my family, i gotta... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... all the things i gotta do, they are what people say i should do... i've been doing what people tell me to do my WHOLE LIFE...

WHEN can i SIT DOWN and NOT DO ANYTHING?

yeah, "NEVER" 's the word.

all the talk about 'o, after university you're free to relax and explore the world' and 'getting to experience new stuff and see cool things alone' and crap... i don't buy it - i got conned.

i think stress does not come from the things i do, it comes when i do them for other people.

*stab*