i need to earn money

and then i need to leave my house.

i will leave - having made myself clear, having them know that i will continue to pursue my dreams, having them know that i will still love them and honour them, but also having them know that they are the cause of it all.

i will play and i will write. i will do what i like.

i will hear and i will listen. i will share my talent.

i will stand and i will go - to where God wants me to go.

and of course i will bring all my Tiggers with me =] hopefully dear dear will come along.

dies

i will never, ever, ever - expect anything, from anyone, anywhere.

i will always expect to be independent.

Father, i give up trying. i'm sorry i get people at the wrong times. i'm sorry that i will WANT someone with me. i'm sorry i want a listener. i'm sorry - You have to do more work in my life.

appreciation

appreciation is not thanking you.

appreciation is thanking God

for everything wonderful and special

and for simply creating you.

=] thank You, Father in heave, for blessing the youth ministry in big and small ways... =] may your presence and guidance continue to spur us and motivate our callings - as one body in Christ, to fulfill Your great plan - 'Kingdom Come'. Amen. =]

V.O.L.T.A.G.E prac

-.-|||

burp.

spent last hours doing last minute stuff. why black background - can't i just put Tigger on it? He'd look so cute on the screen. =D

she just cares... quite alot, actually...

only You can make my heart sing

talking about music still feels like i'm looking at a photo of a long lost lover...

but i have God. =] my first love.

sleepy baby

he is sleeping, i am thinking

he is dreaming, i am working

he is tired, i am strong

HARHAR =] *ramble* bwvv.

dear dear, i am stronger than you because i can sleep less and still not be as tired as you are... i think? heehee...

just talked to Faith =] miss ya babe. =] hope to see u real soon. =] huggies. hmm... i hope u still rmb abit of what i said to u during Camp Exodus. =] love u babe!!!

sister Rachel - pls jiayou okay =] i dunno what u're going through but i'm praying for u still. love ya. =]

okay. sleeping beauty here i come. =D

for your loving ways

thank you for being curt. thank you for not saying 'thank you'. thank you for just being the way you are - they way i've accepted.

reasoning my life out of others'

i think we don't put enough effort into being a Jesus to our friends.

i think sometimes we choose WHO to be Jesus to...

i think sometimes we choose WHEN to be Jesus...

i think sometimes we choose WHERE to be Jesus...

i think sometimes we choose NOT to be Jesus at all...

perhaps we could have done more...

perhaps things would be different...

perhaps i could have given up more...

perhaps people might understand...

maybe they think some people think too much...

maybe they don't see the point...

maybe they think other people will do it...

maybe they just don't see that that 'other people' is me.

how i wish i can just disappear and leave the work to the rest.

but then again, the rest may very well be 'anyone else but me'.

who cares.

God.

21 October 2009

=D dear dear superman =D heehee =)

sunshine love u. =]

phone karaoke

superman is so cute!!!

=] superman sings... for me. =D heehee. =]

daddymummy pls say sorry

Dear God,

why does my family do so much to make me unhappy. Will You understand why I do things? Will You bother that I'm unhappy?

=( alli say sorry

sorry. *hughug*

iHate

arguing.

being forced.

having no other way out.

leon!!! =]

dear brother, =] thank you for saying 'thank you' to me. =] HARHAR. don't look so sad okay, look around - so much joy. =] be glad. =] see ya at church!!!

appreciation belongs in the bin

what ever happened to the words 'thank you'?

welcome to my world, words 'it doesn't matter'.

BEFORE: instant replies

AFTER: miraculous replies

*bwvvvp*

sing - sing a song - a SAD one

i miss singing... k-box... -.-

smiley cheeks!!!

i asked 'why are u so cute?', he replied 'because u are cuter'.

HAHA =] Superman is singing for me over the phone... =D =D =D so CUTE!!!

*tired.stressed.sick.plagued.disgusted*

*lazy.lazy.lazy*

Superman is still singing in a cute little voice over the phone... HAHA =] love u dear dear!!! =]

i wish i could be a super-star... a diva...

thank God i'm better than that - i'm a child of God the Most High. =D amen.

sorry Abba Daddy

Dear God,

sorry for the times when i complain and i fuss and i worry and i get anxious and i get stressed and i get tired... sorry for the times i made Alex worry for me, for the times he got frustrated cos i'm shutting up and the times he got irritated because things like that happen a thousand in a thousand times... sorry that i create extra trouble for myself by thinking i can always make a difference... sorry that i think if i do less of other stuff i might have energy to do more work... sorry for the times i speak badly about people and myself... sorry for being critical... sorry for being sensitive... sorry that i am really difficult to please because i expect the best... sorry that i'm just horribly incapable of managing my time well; and sorry for giving excuses like 'it's not my fault that there're last minute stuff' or 'THEY changed things AGAIN'... sorry for being picky about the people i work with... sorry for being picky even with ministry... sorry that i only want to play piano, i don't want to work i don't wanna study i don't want to do anything but music...

and i'm sorry for doubting that i would ever make it... i know that, just like Job, if i can accept good things from You, why in the world wouldn't i accept trials and testings... i also know that You have purposed me to follow one path and that's Jesus' way... You told me to do things - i haven't accomplished them because i'm not confident and i'm afraid and many other self-related reasons... i know i can't keep pointing at my pastor of my leader for fulfilling what You wanted for me - i have to do that myself. if it really pleases You i will start with today. if it pleases You that much i can even do that when i'm sleeping, maybe... haha.

Father, give me patience - willingness to wait for Your time. Father, give me strength - supernatural strength when i have none. Father, give me vision - to see the destiny You have for me. Father, give me wisdom - to know when to wait, and when to act immediately. one more thing, if You would grant me, please show me clearly - play or no - because all the things i see now are man's signals; i want a God-signal.

thank You Father for loving me and for listening to me talk and talk... i wonder if You ever get tired... hm... i wonder if You are afraid of tickles? many other things - things the Bible didn't say about You. anyway, i will be meeting You soon - will find out then. =D love You. Amen.